A move that could mean a welcome step up for grown-ups can actually be quite scary for a child. That doesn't mean that moving with children necessarily has to be difficult, but it does require extra sensitivity. The more you pay attention to your children's needs and work to address them, the easier the moving process will be for everyone -- including you.
One of the most important things to remember when moving children, especially young children, is that they crave security. Obviously, moving from a familiar neighborhood and home can represent a threat to that security. You might be tempted to talk them out of any fears that result, but try to resist that temptation, because fear is a perfectly normal response for a child. A better approach would be to acknowledge their fears and then explain the benefits of moving. Letting them know the aspects of their lives that will improve because of the change can help soothe them. If you're not sure how best to communicate that, there are many books about moving for children of all ages that will reach them on their individual levels. Some even have interactive elements to help kids understand and get involved with moving, such as spaces to write their own stories about relocating, calendars to track events connected to a move and change of address cards they can fill out and give to their friends.
It's also a good idea to involve children in moving preparations. Depending on their ages, you might not want them to actually pack boxes, but you can certainly enroll them in choosing furniture for their new rooms or sorting old toys and other possessions that can go to charities. In fact, allowing them to go with you to deliver their used toys to a family homeless shelter or battered women's organization can help them let go of the old, because they'll be able to see how much the donations are appreciated.
On moving day, it can help to let your children do small jobs that will keep them busy and allow them to feel part of the process. For example, smaller children can stay in a room with your pets so that all concerned will stay calm or older children can check closets, shelves and drawers for any last-minute items to pack.
If these strategies don't calm your children's fears about moving, there's usually no cause for worry. Their emotions will probably subside when the move is over and they can see the benefits of living in their new home. But every child is different. If your children don't recover quickly, just provide additional support and nurturing until they eventually adjust.
One of the most important things to remember when moving children, especially young children, is that they crave security. Obviously, moving from a familiar neighborhood and home can represent a threat to that security. You might be tempted to talk them out of any fears that result, but try to resist that temptation, because fear is a perfectly normal response for a child. A better approach would be to acknowledge their fears and then explain the benefits of moving. Letting them know the aspects of their lives that will improve because of the change can help soothe them. If you're not sure how best to communicate that, there are many books about moving for children of all ages that will reach them on their individual levels. Some even have interactive elements to help kids understand and get involved with moving, such as spaces to write their own stories about relocating, calendars to track events connected to a move and change of address cards they can fill out and give to their friends.
It's also a good idea to involve children in moving preparations. Depending on their ages, you might not want them to actually pack boxes, but you can certainly enroll them in choosing furniture for their new rooms or sorting old toys and other possessions that can go to charities. In fact, allowing them to go with you to deliver their used toys to a family homeless shelter or battered women's organization can help them let go of the old, because they'll be able to see how much the donations are appreciated.
On moving day, it can help to let your children do small jobs that will keep them busy and allow them to feel part of the process. For example, smaller children can stay in a room with your pets so that all concerned will stay calm or older children can check closets, shelves and drawers for any last-minute items to pack.
If these strategies don't calm your children's fears about moving, there's usually no cause for worry. Their emotions will probably subside when the move is over and they can see the benefits of living in their new home. But every child is different. If your children don't recover quickly, just provide additional support and nurturing until they eventually adjust.
No comments:
Post a Comment